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⑤ Reasons You Should Eat Potatoes Rather Than Throw Them At People’s Heads

Reason #1 is the most important, although the other reasons are also most important. But #1 is the mostest importantest one out of all of the ones.

Edward John
6 min readSep 8, 2022

WARNING: This article contains a reference to Jim Carrey. If he’s not your cup of tea, perhaps you should try coffee instead. If that doesn’t float your boat, perhaps you should get a dinghy. If they are all sold out, maybe go swimming instead. If it’s too cold for swimming or you’re not near water, I don’t know, watch Netflix or something.

If you are thinking of throwing potatoes at people, I would like to stop you right there and say, “You just stop that right now, or I will pay a fat person to sit on you.”

Why?

I have several reasons, and if you read on, you will find out what they are. They all make perfect sense, and after reading this, you will never throw potatoes at people ever again, except maybe in a war situation. But I hope that doesn’t happen to you, and if it does, other weapons are more effective anyway.

Here are the five reasons, starting with #1, which immediately follows this sentence.

① Being hit in the head by a potato…

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Edward John
Edward John

Written by Edward John

Sometimes my inside is full of sunshine 🌞 edwardjohnwritesATgmailDOTcom

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