I couldn't be bothered to read the whole article, so I asked my AI tool to shorten it to a single paragraph. This is what it came up with:

My grandma had a trick that she used often. She would challenge me to do something while doing another task, like taking out the garbage while hopping on one leg or washing dishes while reciting Peruvian poetry. My wife also enjoys the game, and challenges me to tasks like washing dishes naked or giving her a foot massage while reciting poetry. I even accepted a dare to write an entire article with every word as a link. Don't click on the link to Patrick Eades' article, but click on any other link to read my articles.

But I couldn't be bothered to read all that either, so I asked the AI tool to shorten it some more (several times, until it was short enough), and this is what it came out with:

My grandma and wife give me tricky tasks, like taking out the trash while hopping on one foot or massaging their feet while reciting poetry. I wrote an article where every word is a link, except for Patrick Eades' article. Click any link in my article to read it.

Then I asked the AI tool to rewrite it in the style of a Jamaican, and this is what it wrote:

Mi grandma and mi wife dem love fi give mi tricky task, like taking out di trash while hopping pon one foot or massaging dem foot dem while reciting poetry. Mi write an article where every word is a link, except fi Patrick Eades' article. Click any link inna mi article fi read it.