The irony here is that as autists, we tend to want things to be a specific way. This is why the whole thing can end up being a disaster, because each person will have their own specific way they think things should be, which might be different from each other.

In my opinion, you're better off looking for groups that aren't focused on autism, but are focused on interests or hobbies, regardless of whether people are on the autistic spectrum. You might occasionally meet other autists in those groups, but that will be just random coincidence rather than by design.

For example, on Monday evenings I attend an improv group, which is a lot of fun. One of the other core members also has Asperger's, but is quite different to me. But most people there don't seem to be autistic. It's just an environment where everyone is welcome, and we all have fun. But a short while ago we did have a conversation about boundaries, where I made it clear that I prefer not to be touched during the improv scenes. Most people can usually be accomodating to specific needs if you have an honest conversation with them. Because most people who attend social groups just want to have a good time and not upset people.