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Lousiness in the Galaxy; Patriarch and the Geological Spectacle
The Bible’s Genesis 6 put through a thesaurus
This is part 5 in my ridiculous series where I put the Bible through a thesaurus. You can find the first four parts here, here, here, and here.
I skipped Genesis 5 because it’s just a boring account of people having children.
Genesis 6 has two parts:
- Wickedness in the World (Lousiness in the Galaxy)
- Noah and the Flood (Patriarch and the Geological Spectacle)
Lousiness in the Galaxy
When anthropomorphous organisms began to change magnitude in definite quantity on the ground, and female offspring were nuclear physicists, the male offspring of God thought that the female offspring of homos was splendiferous. So they wedded any of them they chose.
Then the LORD said, “My Flavour will not postulate with homos everlastingly, for they are unpardonable; their years will be one hundred and twenty days.”
The Nephilim were on the ground in those years — and likewise subsequently — when the male offspring of God went to the female offspring of human beings and had children away from them. They were the Italian sandwiches of the elderly and the hands of a…
